The Lawnmower Man

As mentioned last week, on Thursdays I telework and normally get a ton of work done due to the lack of interruptions and distractions in the office. Yesterday – or at least yesterday morning – that was not the case thanks to aforementioned crazy neighbor (aka recycling captain, psycho weedwhacker, tiny dog tormentor). I will refer to him as CN for the remainder of this post.

While I often find it convenient that CN cuts my grass (especially since he uses his own lawnmower and his own gas), there are occasions when his kind deed is unwelcome. For example, I do not appreciate it when he decides that “operation neighborhood lawn trim” is to take place on Saturday morning at 6:30 a.m. I call it “operation neighborhood lawn trim” (ONLT) because he also cuts other neighbors’ lawns, so when he starts at 6:30, he’s not done until around 9:30 because he has a mower with a bag that often has to be emptied. Houses are very close to each other in this neighborhood, so I hear the mower the entire time.

So, yesterday morning ONLT kicked off at 7:30. Since Zoe's sense of hearing rivals that of dolphins, she was immediately on full enemy alert: frantically pacing between my bedroom windows, barking her head off, jumping into the window sills and pawing the glass. It goes without saying that I got out of bed at 7:32, even though I could've slept until almost 9:00...GRRRR!

Thank goodness I am usually gone to work when CN carries out ONLT, because this is how the rest of the morning went...

Zoe made wild laps around the house, attacking each window and the kitchen's sliding glass door as she followed CN on his mowing path. Of course Bailey barked the whole time because Zoe was barking. Bailey was comic relief in this instance because I really don't think he knew what he was barking at. He didn't even get off of his bed. He wasn't even barking in the direction of the noise OR Zoe. I should really call him "My Clueless Houdini."

At one point, I surprised CN when I threw back the kitchen curtain to find him taunting Zoe, who was violently throwing herself at the glass door. She's only 7 1/2 pounds, but the door was shaking. He really thought his actions were funny. I did NOT agree.

I'm starting to realize that the following two things are in order:

1. CN needs a serious talking to, or a good scare from Zoe (off-leash).
2. I'm going to have to start mowing my own lawn again.